Day 30 of 40 Pride and Prejudice

I tend to feel someone’s mood, even from quite a distance. At least that’s how I interpret it. Last week the washing machine repairman was here. I had seen him once years ago in the other house but couldn’t remember how he looked like. Obvious he was older, like we all are. But there was something else. I chatted a little with him while he was doing the job and when he was done he took a seat to write the invoice. And it took quite a while to write that because he told me his life story in between. He has been seriously ill and is so low of energy that he goes straight to bed after a day working. A sad story and I truly hope he has some good time left before it’s too late for him.

That same day another older man passed by, slowly walking behind his walker. I greeted him but didn’t recognize him until he teasingly asked what I did with “his” bench. Then I remembered it. One day I came into my kitchen and saw someone sitting on the bench which stood under the kitchen window. Because it was a little unusual I went to him and asked him if he was all right. He just needed a break from walking to the shops, he said. He reminded me of that too last week. And then he told me that he has handed in his driving license after having a stroke. When cheerfully saying goodbye after some more chatting he slowly walked on to his appointment with the physiotherapist.

That’s how I like it, when I feel strong enough I subconsciously encourage people to shovel some more on my shoulders. But when I say to someone that it is very heavy what I’m doing at the moment or that I worry about not being able to do my coming exams properly, all I do is struggling and postponing to write that to the coordinator of my course. It feels like failing that I can’t move houses and study like I should at the same time. Better I take the bull by the horns and write that damn e-mail.